Shocking Music

I'm attending a parenting class. My goal is to find and keep motivation to implement a system that encourages my son to get his schoolwork and chores completed, and engage in other meaningful, skill building activities. Video games and videos don't build much character.

At the last class, the subject of what music your kid is listening to came up, and the facilitators passed out a sheets of rap lyrics displaying all that violent, misogynistic, hate filled, shocking phrases that those delightful little rappers use. The ensuing discussion took long enough that we didn't get through the agenda for the night. Why did this subject inspire so much enthusiastic response, and take so long to discuss?

Rock n Roll is about defiance, it's about sticking it to the man and to conventions and raging against the machine. It's about offending sensibilities and numbing the pain of existence. It's about sex and violence and the ugly underbelly of the human condition. And for many of the rappers, it's about the world they actually live in. Can I as a parent really say, that is wrong, don't listen to it? Well I certainly can't, because I'm mad as hell at the injustice and oppression our institutions perpetrate, and if someone with a microphone can provide me catharsis for my anger, then I'm all for it. If rap can help me understand the twisted world of our impoverished streets, the dysfunctional minds of the criminal character, then I'm slightly more informed having that glimpse. Here's a snippet of a Tech N9ne piece I allow my son to play in my presence:

I'm a little dysfunctional, Don't you know?
If you push me, It might be bad
Get a little emotional, Don't you know?
You could fool around and make me mad.

There are crazy people in this world, sociopaths, and some of them are political leaders, and captains of industry, and "[they] don't got no scruples." I don't mind my son listening to that song, because he should know that those crazies exist. We all know it. That's a reason why the discussion on denying our children access to these offensive music inspired so much discussion. We all know that there's crazies in charge, and if somebody's shedding some light on that, maybe we should let it shine. While Dysfunctional is about a partying street thug, it does provide a glimpse into a messed up mind, and that glimpse increases understanding that can translate into other social arenas. And understanding is good. The truth can set your mind free.

That doesn't mean I don't restrict what my son listens to, at least in my presence. I won't tolerate anything I don't believe has redeeming value. I got him to understand why I detested a particular artist and his sexually abusive lyrics, and my son voluntarily deleted the songs off his iPod.